Stay Classy, LeBron

LeBron James, upon losing to the Mavs in the NBA Finals:

"All the people that was rooting on me to fail, at the end of the day they have to wake up tomorrow and have the same life that they had before they woke up today. They have the same personal problems they had today. I’m going to continue to live the way I want to live and continue to do the things that I want to do with me and my family and be happy with that. They can get a few days or a few months or whatever the case may be on being happy about not only myself, but the Miami Heat not accomplishing their goal. But they have to get back to the real world at some point.

Translation:

It's LBJ everyone, look how Bron is livinn'!! So bummed right now that I have to throw on this Armani suit and talk to you broke-ass reporters. The worst part is that after this I have to hop in my Ferrari and reflect upon what just happened all the way back to my multi-million dollar mansion. I'm probably going to ponder what tomorrow will bring while I wait for the elevator that takes me from my kitchen to my custom memorabilia room. Then I might ask my private chef to saute me some lean chicken breast while I go and watch film from Game 6 in my personal theater. Either that, or Kung Fu Panda 2, I haven't decided yet. I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning to freshly squeezed Spanish orange juice and a Tyrannosaurus Rex omelette, while all you NBA fans will wake up to the stale leftover pizza and the flat Pepsi that you and your friends ordered last night when you got together to watch King James on your modest little 32 inch television. Good luck with those overdue phone bills and car payments, I don't really know how all that works since Ma bought me that Range Rover in high school. Anyway, enjoy that Miami Heat loss, because I certainly enjoy stepping over you to get into the club and watching you buy my sneakers in 20 different colors. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going scuba diving with Chris Tucker and Aquaman. All hail the King.